This past year has been the hardest year of my life. People LOVE to warn you how hard it is to have a baby… and sure IT IS hard *at times* but genuinely I loved it too. What do I not love? My kids being sick. What is the very hardest part of parenting in my opinion? Taking care of sick kids when you have SO much to do and you also don’t feel good.
When we moved here, I was not prepared for the onslaught of germs we’d encounter at our new daycare. These germs eventually lead us to ear tube surgery for my littlest. My kids had been at daycare for a while in Dallas and generally did fine. I’m not 100% sure if my littlest was fine solely because of the amount of breastmilk she was consuming or it was because she wasn’t mobile yet… or maybe I just got lucky.
Somehow, my firstborn has NEVER had an ear infection. I’m not exactly sure how this has happened, but it is still true to this day. My second born is a completely different story. Since starting daycare, she has had an ear infection at least once a month. It has been absolutely brutal and my heart breaks for her thinking about how painful it is to deal with an ear infection. In the midst of this very sick season of life, we discovered she is VERY allergic to a common antibiotic used to treat ear infections. Even without this allergy, she would have been a good candidate for ear tube surgery, but this made it even more likely that ear tube surgery was the right choice for us. Regardless, it wasn’t without a heavy dose of parent anxiety.
ENT Referral
After four separate ear infections, our pediatrician gave us a referral to an ENT. Despite my husband having had ear tube surgery as a child, but we were very hesitant about our baby girl getting surgery. As a mom, I tend to prefer the low intervention route (within reason) when possible. I absolutely reach for medicine when warranted. Obviously repeated antibiotic use isn’t low intervention, but the idea of my 18 month old being put under anesthesia for surgery gave me so much anxiety. I cried at the thought of it.
I cried at the thought of handing over my baby to strangers and having her medicated for surgery.
Frustration at how expensive it really is to be a working mom ate away at me. This was just another expense associated with having my kids in daycare and exposed to so many colds. Cue more tears.
I cried at the shear cost of surgery itself. More money I just didn’t want to spend in general.
I let the guilt of being a working mom eat away at myself – IF ONLY I hadn’t chosen to be a working mom, then I’d be better able to protect her from daycare germs and keep ear infections/colds to a more manageable occurrence interval (and eventually she’d grow out of the ear infections).
Fear and what ifs go to both my husband and I. This is a slit placed in her ear. Could this affect her hearing?
Personally, I think most of my fears and worries were mounted by the amount of time I waited around for my referred ENT to get back to us… In fact I had two additional referrals before we landed in our pediatrician’s office with a fifth ear infection before we got an ENT to call us back. I don’t exactly know why this ended up being so difficult, but I would bet its partially because they have no lack of demand. Ear tube surgery is apparently incredibly common.
ENT Consult
Despite the struggles getting in contact with an ENT, I am so glad we landed with the one we did. Our surgeon did consults over the phone (which is absolutely amazing as a busy working mom). There was not a long wait time for this consult and our surgeon supplied us with plenty of time, space, and information to help us make the best decision possible. Our consult helped us understand exactly what to expect and best of all, he told us something I don’t think anyone really told us, but I desperately needed to hear.
“You don’t HAVE to get surgery. You CAN keep treating ear infections as you have been.”
I’ve found that sometimes medical advice and discussions make me feel like I HAVE to do something. I’m so thankful for the reminder that this is all about informed consent and just because it is a referral or a recommendation does not mean that you have to do the surgery/whatever the recommendation is.
Having been given this advice, I decided to postpone our initial scheduled surgery date and give myself time to think. Honestly, I kinda hoped the ear infections would just go away as we got warmer weather (and less exposure to strep throat in our house). SPOILER ALERT. IT DID NOT.
We did end up suffering ANOTHER ear infection. Oh this one was an especially brutal double ear infection as well. It was obvious my little one was absolutely miserable and I knew that ear tube surgery was the best choice for us. At this point, it seemed clear our ear infections could be doing more harm to her than any of my fears associated with surgery. We grabbed another round of antibiotics and vowed to do our best to survive three more weeks until our scheduled surgery.
The Morning of Ear Tube Surgery
As with typical surgeries, there are restrictions on eating and drinking before surgery. Surgery times are typically scheduled with the youngest patients. Our scheduled check in time was 6am. Genuinely I did not know how I would entertain a hungry, tired toddler entertained between the time I wake her up and when she’s actually allowed to eat again. SOMEHOW it ended up not being too bad.
I woke up early, packed up the car and grabber her straight out of bed and put her in the car and left. Her car seat was lovingly stocked with her lovey“>lovey, blanket, and favorite elmo stuffie. I didn’t even change her diaper beforehand. I strategically hid all snacks in the car/in view before leaving to avoid the reminder of what she’s missing. Truthfully, the experience went a lot smoother than I expected. The children’s hospital we were at was SO wonderful and had so many tools to keep my little one occupied. From iPads to cute decor on the walls for my little one to play at, she was entertained and comfortable while waiting for surgery.
Each nurse gave us extensive updates on the process and ample opportunity to ask questions. Our surgeon also met with us beforehand and gave us the opportunity to ask any additional questions. For the most part, this helped my nerves. I was surprised, though I’m not sure why, that I wasn’t able to be in the room while she was put under anesthesia. I should have known this was standard… my husband wasn’t in the room when I got my spinal for my C-section!
Truthfully, I teared up at the thought that I would have to hand her off while she was fully coherent, but our team did absolutely everything they could to help me feel ok. I had no doubts or questions left.
I knew my daughter wouldn’t like being handed off to strangers. Who would? She’s got intense separation anxiety and this obviously wasn’t any exception. I just tried to walk away to the waiting area as much as I could while she cried.
For our ear tube surgery, the anesthesia was purely nitrous oxide aka laughing gas. Before I left, I asked how they get kids to sit still and take the nitrous oxide when they’re this little… they described it as a “kind of hug.” HAA…
After this, a nurse guided me to a designated waiting area and advised me NOT to get breakfast because the surgery would be very quick. I’d heard this from other moms so I expected it to go by quickly. I rushed back after a bathroom break but in our particular surgery, I was actually surprised how long it took for them to grab me to come back to recovery to be with her. After about 20 minutes, our surgeon let me know that surgery went well and gave me some antibiotic ear drops. Expectedly, he said he suctioned out quite a bit of drainage back there. I love how he described it – “It was a lot. It was snot.” HA. Knowing this, I was SO thankful we got in when we did. It sounded like another ear infection waiting to happen.
Ear Tube Surgery: The (sorta) Bad
The nurses let me know that they’d bring me back to her recovery room as she was starting to wake up. They warned me that its possible she’ll be crying before I get there but she “won’t remember it” because she’d still be waking up from anesthesia. Genuinely that may be true for a lot of kids, but I must’ve got in there late. This girl did know she was awake around strangers. I heard her wailing and walked as fast as I could towards her. That poor nurse could not calm my baby down… genuinely she was happy to be with me for maybe 10 seconds before she remembered she was upset about everything.
The nurses offered some Tylenol which she gladly took. Afterwards, they gave me some apple juice to see how she tolerated it… She wasn’t into it AT ALL. Genuinely, she didn’t perk up till I started to grab my stuff and she realized we were leaving. HAHA… she just wanted to get out of there.
As I mentioned before, SO MANY people warned me the surgery is very short. Personally, I was kind of surprised how long it felt. I probably had to wait about 30 minutes before I was invited to the recovery room to be with her. Knowing her anesthesia was just nitrous oxide (aka laughing gas), I didn’t expect her to be asleep long. I’m glad I didn’t get nervous about it all at the time but I wish I had a more accurate wait time… I could have really freaked out about how long I was waiting if I had to wait much longer after EVERYONE told me this was SUPER short.
I’m not sure if it would have made much of a difference, but if I could go back in time I’d redo where I waited. I waited pretty far away from the door where they called for me to meet her in recovery. I probably would have asked where the recovery area was and/or the closest space for me to wait to get to her when she’s ready. I’m not sure it would have made a difference, but it’d be a piece of advice I’d give to myself if I could go back in time.
Ear Tube Surgery: The Beautiful
Upon leaving, Our hospital had the cutest little treat for kiddos post surgery. Upon leaving, they’re able to choose a “prize” to take home. Most were a bunch of super cute stuffed animals, but there were a couple of action figure options. My little one picked out a sweet little elephant. Again she was mostly ready to get out of there but the whole gesture of kindness helped to put my mama heart at ease. Our elephant had a QR code that lead to https://www.hugaroo.org/. What a beautiful little idea. THEY deserve a prize. The website has options to donate money or buy some stuffed animals off of amazon for them. I plan on paying it forward and buying a couple soon. I love good people doing good!
Ear Tube Surgery Recovery
Ear tube surgery recovery was a breeze. I think almost every person I talked to warned me my child would be more tired than usual for that day and then she’d be back to normal. She was more cuddly as tired for maybe an hour? After1 hour at home, my child WAS NOT more tired than usual. She took her usual nap. Genuinely she had a great leap in happiness as soon as we left the hospital. She took a normal nap and after that she had her appetite back and was back to sprinting across the house. We went back to swim lessons the next day as though nothing had ever happened.
One thing to note – I got a lot of contradictory recommendations about swimming after ear tube surgery. I decided to follow my surgeon’s recommendation but it was basically that there wasn’t a concern with swimming unless she was going to be diving over 10ft or if she was going into “dirty” water like lakes. We’ve been swimming as normal with no issues. I noticed she has different sensations when she swims under water. She has been swimming great! Maybe not as much of a fan of diving for rings under water but otherwise pretty normal!
One Month Update: The VERY GOOD!
Overall, I was very nervous about the procedure and her being put under anesthesia but once the surgery was complete, I felt an immediate sense of relief. Our girl has had 6 ear infections in the past 6 months!! I’m incredibly relieved we (probably) avoided an imminent ear infection with the surgery. THANK YOU science for this relief for my sweet little girl. I didn’t fully realize how much anxiety I carried with me about every runny nose she had until I had the relief of knowing it won’t automatically cause an ear infection now.
I’ll be closely watching her progress and documenting it as we go but I have immense hope for our future. Our surgeon was absolutely so kind and wonderful. I’m thankful for this great technology and the people that put so much effort and training into becoming part of a surgical team. We’re excited for the future with fewer ear infections, infections that can be treated easier, and generally just having less pain for our little girl!
What to Pack for Ear tube Surgery
As mentioned before, our hospital was incredibly accommodating. Plenty of entertainment for children. Regardless, some items from home are always great to have on hand!
- Favorite Blanket
- Lovey/favorite stuffy
- comfy jammies
- book/fav toy (we like hot wheels!)
- diapers
- wipes
What NOT to pack
Snacks: keep anything that would even make them think about snacks before surgery away. You don’t want any signs of a snack to accidentally fall out of your diaper bag or be found in your purse!
Water Bottle: Same as above. You don’t want them to think about it at all. You don’t need a water bottle, they will supply you with a cup/straw/whatever you need after surgery.
Ear Tube Surgery Conclusions
Looking back on our journey to ear tubes, I’m glad we chose the path we did. Choosing to get ear tubes is just that – A CHOICE. I think its something to think about carefully and decide if that is the best choice for your family and your personal situation. I’m so thankful our surgeon reminded me that it is just a tool for dealing with ear infections and we didn’t HAVE to have surgery just because it was recommended. I’m thankful for the science and technology that can give my daughter relief from so much pain. I’m thankful for the kind wonderful people that make the choice to help people and answer endless questions. If any mom asks me about ear tube surgery, I’d have great things to say! This choice was the right choice for us AND I’m glad we took our time making this choice.